Inter-racial dating in the "new" South Africa. How much have things really changed?

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NicolaWade11
December 4th, 2009 at 11:35am

As a 20-something white South African in an inter-racial relationship, I have been surprised by the varying degrees of acceptance or blatant repudiation between the different generations. While my peers and colleagues do not recognise him as any different to myself or themselves, the older generation sometimes react with extreme negativity and drop comments which leave me both reeling and fuming by the outright prejudice of their mindset.

I would love to hear your thoughts or comments about this (still) controversial topic.

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  • 1. South Africa is most certainly new. The problem lies in the older new South Africans. It's not they they don't want to be new, but they spent so much time being old that new doesn't come so easily to them...still with me?
    What I mean is that the older generations can barely master the interweb, never mind new political and social paradigms. It's a case of not being able to teach an old dog new tricks.
    And while it doesn't make it right by any means, or easy to cope with, I think a modicum of patience is required here.

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    claudiskies
    December 8th, 2009 at 10:25am
  • 2. I doubt that Jan van Riebeeck and his brigade were angels when they arrived in the Cape of Good Hope - imagine a boat full of guys and then you get to land and sit with a choice - wait for the woman that are bound to arrive in a few months or ...
    Mention this to the old folk and see their reaction!

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    Carel-Kat
    December 9th, 2009 at 1:08pm
  • 3. Aiy Carel-Kat, you make me laugh!
    Nicola, surely people in the cities have sorted themselves out by now? I mean, 'daar in die platteland' you could expect a somewhat frosty reception when you swing by the kroeg for a Klippies & Coke. But in Cape Town or Jo'burg?
    Or am I just being naive?

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    SandraMallinson
    December 9th, 2009 at 2:05pm
  • 4. I was in a mixed race marriage - if one can still use that unsavoury term - and though I didn't notice anything when we were out at the malls and so on, she did - and was upset by it. And this was in Cape Town so I'm afraid that old habits die hard even in what is (falsely in my opinion) the city seen as the country's liberal heartland.
    I also believe that more attention is paid to a couple where the woman is white and her partner black. White people with frog spawn for brains obviously feel threatened by this, whereas there has long been a history in South Africa, particularly among coloured women, of "marrying up" - ie to a white man.
    You're just going to have to live with it I'm afraid.

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    thefynbosguy
    December 9th, 2009 at 3:27pm
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